I hate traffic. I don’t even want to think about how much of my life has been wasted sitting idle on the road. That’s why people like to text and drive. But f**k that, people die texting while driving. I’m starting a new craze; DJaying while driving. That’s much safer. If you have a laptop you can DJ in the car during traffic for under $100.

It’s really easy to do. I bought a USB DJ controller for $50, an ION DISCOVERY DJ. It’s not pro equipment, but it’s got all the basic controls. It came with crap DJ software but again, it’s more than enough to have a TON of fun. To get two separate sound channels out of my Windows laptop, I had to get a male-stereo-to-female-mono split adapter. I plugged that into the laptop’s headphone jack, then stuck a male-mono-to-female-stereo adapter onto one of the female mono outputs of the splitter. You have to get this other part or else the stereo system may sound funny. Be careful picking these parts out in Radio Shack…there are alot of adapters and splitters that look exactly the same, you have to read the specs for the terms mentioned above. I got a cassette adapter for my stereo, hooked it up to the adapted part of the splitter and hooked my headphones into the other jack. It works beautifully; I play right through the car sound system. Don’t get a radio transmitter, they suck. If your dashboard has a 3mm audio-in port, then just connect straight to that. Then you just get a $20 power inverter to keep the laptop running and plug that into the cigarette port.

You could have a friend drive and mix from the passenger or back seat. Roll up on a group of people, a drive-through, a traffic jam, downtown, a park, or a stoplight and do your thing. By the way, if you already have an iPad, just get an app called Algoriddim DJay and the splitters I mentioned. The app is $10 but is worth $400.

DJ while driving

A rolling sneak-attack of funk.

DJ laptop audio splitter

Make two channels out of a laptop headphone jack

Closeup of DJ audio splitters

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